60 Quotes By - Denis Leary | Status Free Download

60 Quotes By - Denis Leary
60 Quotes By - Denis Leary


60 Quotes By - Denis Leary | FaceBook Status Free Download


Stand-up comedy and comedy in general is the ultimate form of free speech, because you get to poke holes in all the pretentious bubbles politicians and pundits and popes and pretenders try to float over our heads.

Denis Leary

Here's the problem with Easter. The Catholic Church needs to pick a date because it keeps moving. And I think the reason they always have Easter moving to different dates is to catch us.

Denis Leary

Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

It says on the back of the Nyquil box, 'May cause drowsiness.' It should say, 'Don't make any plans, OK? Kiss your family and friends good-bye.'

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

We live in a country where John Lennon takes eight bullets, Yoko Ono is walking right beside him and not one hits her. Explain that to me!

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

No matter what anybody says, relationships are based on physical attraction. The first time I saw my wife, it was pure animal whatever.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

When I was a teenager, you couldn't get straight pants. Then in '76, when punk started to hit, it was a revelation that you could find straight pants again.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I would have to commit a crime and have cops chase me. That would be the only way to get me to jog five miles.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Hockey's my favorite sport.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Kathy Bates is sexy. It's partly because of her talent, but she's got a great face, and a great laugh.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

If you do good work, it tends to stick around. People still come up to me and say, 'The Ref' is my favorite Christmas movie.'

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

My only worry about tweeting and modern technology is how it has crept into even the darkest corners of the absolute global village we live in.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Once you have a firefighter in your family, your family and the families from his crew become one big extended family.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

My biggest regret in life is that I didn't hit John Denver in the mouth while I has the chance.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I'm really good at laundry, and I have no problem cleaning the kitchen.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I think it's a shame when you come across young actors and musicians who haven't had the time to learn their craft. It doesn't matter if it's acting or music; you really have to learn how to do it from the bottom up because unless you have a great work ethic... fame is a terrible thing to have.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I'm born and raised in the Northeast. My parents are Irish immigrants. So our tendency is to shy away from the big yellow ball that comes up in the sky every once in a while.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

How many whales do we really need? I figure five. One for each ocean.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

When I go to Batman movies, I always think, 'Man, I would like to be a bad guy in a Batman movie.' especially as they got darker when they go to the Christian Bale era.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I want you to take away the hope because that's the thing that's killing me.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I will not bond. I will not share. I refuse to nurture.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

You can't teach somebody how to be funny. You're either funny, or you ain't.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I bought my daughter a Chihuahua and I fell in love with it. So now I carry Coco around with me all the time.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

The things that make me angry still make me angry. George Carlin is 67, and he's still as funny as he's ever been, and he's still angry. And that makes me feel good, because I feel like if I stick around long enough, I'll still be able to work.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I think daycare is great for people who have to work two jobs. My problem is with people who are dropping kids off at daycare because they want to go out and spend the day golfing or getting their nails done. You know what I mean? That's not why they invented daycare.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I don't want a president like me! I suck, okay. I want an elitist, smart guy.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

No woman can be completely happy at any one moment in time. They're always anticipating the next thing to argue or complain about.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I'm still pretty self-centered, greedy and angry.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Most of the women placed in the fire department here in New York never passed the physical test. And a fat guy or a short guy, or anybody not passing the test in a life-or-death job, leads to friction.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I think we're going to carry the 'Ice Age's up to 'Ice Age 15,' which means basically they'll be in the present decade.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

With any actor, if you know your character well enough, you'll know pretty much what he would say under any circumstance, or whatever situation might rear its head.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Not eating meat is a decision, eating meat is an instinct.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Firefighters are some of the most selfless public servants you will ever encounter.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Everyone's got skeletons in their closet, and I've got a million in mine, believe me. I tested the envelope; I pushed it. Whenever somebody in authority told me not to do something, I did it just to find out why they said not to do it.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Willem Dafoe and I are actually the same person.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps! End of list.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Doing the same character over and over, it gets boring.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

My cousin Jerry Lucey and five other firefighters died in a warehouse fire in Worcester, Mass. - my hometown - right in the middle of our old neighborhood downtown when a homeless couple started a fire to keep warm and the entire building went up. My cousin died trying to save homeless people who had already left the building.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

What firefighters and people in our military and cops do is separate from what the rest of us do; basically these people say, 'I'm going to protect all these strangers.'

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

George Carlin was great right up to the end of his life. But Richard Pryor was probably the best, most gifted stand-up comedian who will ever live.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I'm really happy I went to a Catholic school because a lot of the repressive tactics they use make for great senses of humor.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

One thing that's great about firefighters: If they don't have the equipment they desperately need, they don't have the help, they don't care. They'll do it on their own.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country and call it Irate. All the pissed off people live in one place and get it over with.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Firefighters don't go on strike.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Wolfhounds helped kill off the wolves in Ireland.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

My dad was very much a John Wayne kind of guy, but he was also a great guy, great sense of humor, a real dedicated dad. I don't think he ever missed a hockey game I was in.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

People saying, 'Life didn't turn out the way I wanted it to.' Welcome to the club. I wanted to be the starting center-fielder for the Boston Red Sox, for chrissakes!

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

If you want a long-term relationship that doesn't require a lot of work, I say, get a dog. They love you no matter what. But when it comes to humans, there's no secret; you really have to appreciate the person every single day.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I basically - I don't like tattoos, unless you're a firefighter who has a tattoo that has to do with that or a military guy. That's - those are people who should have tattoos.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Bill Murray doesn't do anything. He barely shows up at the movies he says he's going to do.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Most people don't know how underpaid and often ill-equipped urban fire departments are across North America.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I went to school with Steven Wright, who was the shyest guy I knew, and one day someone suddenly told me that he was in a club doing standup comedy. I went down to his club and he was great. Another friend of mine, who was pretty much a thief by trade, was hosting the show. So I thought, 'If these guys can do it, then so can I.'

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I do have to say that I think that President Obama is the greatest President in the history of all of our Presidents, and that he can do no wrong in my book. So how's that for prejudice on the Democratic side?

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Anybody who's done standup will tell you that there's nothing like it. The show starts at 8:00, the curtain goes up and there's nobody else except you and the audience, and you just perform for them for two hours. Nobody yells, 'Cut!' There are no retakes. That is still the most exciting medium for me, and I love it.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

Jon Stewart is exactly the same guy he's always been, only with money. He knows that the moment he really believes he's important, the funny goes away and he becomes Bill O'Reilly, except shorter and Jewish.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I'm a lapsed Catholic in the best sense of the word.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

My goal is to leave this planet with the biggest carbon footprint I can possibly leave.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

I know gay - gay people who aren't married who are better parents than some, you know, straight people I know who are married.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

The biggest battle for a lot of people who come out of the theater, which is where I was trained, is that they can never forget that a camera is pointed at them.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

The best comedy audiences in the country and this is tried and true, I'm not just saying it, in my opinion are Boston, Atlanta, and Chicago.

Denis Leary


Free Status Quote By - Denis Leary

You can have good writing, but a great actor will make it feel and sound like great writing. You can have great writing, and mediocre actors will make it feel mediocre. Without the actors, you have nothing.

Denis Leary



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